Hello, Caring Parent!

First, as an attorney, social worker, educator and empowerment coach, I can tell you that it's not easy to build confidence and communicate, no matter how young we are or what our role in life is each day. :)

The spoken and unspoken messages we receive from all around us - friends, colleagues, family, media, teachers, strangers, parents - help shape and socialize us. We've all had moments when we question ourselves and wonder whether our answer was the "right" answer. In other words, learning to be a person is hard, and it never stops. It's perfectly normal to question our decisions and how we communicate our needs and wants to others, even after it's said and done.

That being said, what I think you're actually getting at is trust, not necessarily about self-confidence or communication.

Understanding why we think the way we do, what we think and how it changes our future thoughts and behaviors, that's one of the most important lessons we can all learn.

The idea of intuition, an internal "gut" feeling, is linked to the external demonstration of who we are (and who we will become) as people. Your question asks how YOU can help HER. It seems that an important piece of the puzzle could be trust.

Whatever decision your child makes, whether it's the "gut" decision or the rationalized, justified, weighed decision, it's important that you support your child's right to make the decision she made, even if you think it's the wrong one. Your child needs to know you trust her (and also that you trust yourself and your role as parent). From there, she can learn to trust herself and process the reaction/response from others without internalizing it as her own. This isn't the final "answer" to the question, of course. There's a million questions I want to ask, but at least this can be a start. :)

I've been working directly with others - from 8th graders to retirees - for about 20 years now, helping them figure out who they are, what they want and why they want it. I especially love working with people who think they've got it all figured out, too! :) You'd be surprised at how often "using your voice" comes up as a topic of concern. I'd be happy to jump on a call to discuss more, if you'd like.

You've got this, okay? And so does she. Take care.